Wait for me.... I am your leader

Do you ever feel like that? You're following when you should be leading-or vice versa. Welcome to the club.

Men are born both leaders and followers. It's often a question of timing. There are times when we must lead and others when we should follow. The places to be a leader abound: our communities, our jobs, and our homes. The degree of influence we have in these various arenas varies. However, when it comes to spiritual leadership of the family, we have our job description. Spiritual leadership is a God-given responsibility to men. Sorry, ladies. Please don't shoot the messenger!

Research indicates that when a woman/mom leads the family in the commitment to a church, 17% of families follow. But, when a man/dad leads the way in commitment to a church, 93% of families follow! That is a lot of power! After giving men this responsibility, should we be surprised if He provides these leadership gifts in abundance to men? What's more important than eternity-I mean really?

We all want to follow a powerful leader. That is why many people follow Jesus as their leader. He was decisive, powerful, courageous, bold, and confrontational. He was encouraging, compassionate, and understanding. He was everything a great leader should be-and more.

Who do you follow? Who follows you?

No More Mister Nice Guy

So, what kind of guy are you? Do people know where you stand on issues, or do you smile and let people guess? Do you admit your mistakes and move on, or do you hide them and fret? Do you embrace conflict when defending what is right, or do you avoid conflict at all costs? Are you a nice guy or a good guy? There is a difference.

Many men today have been raised to be nice guys. (Look at the lead male character in most any chick flick.) They are taught early on that hitting, pushing, and fighting are wrong. Nice guys never hit, push, or fight. Right? We are told to be nice and turn the other cheek.

Stop already... these are the kind of guys whose man card needs to be revoked. Occasionally, standing up for what's important can result in some bruises. We don't need to walk around with a chip on our shoulder, and we don't need to be a jerk or bully, but standing up for what is right requires no apology.

We have been taught that Jesus was loving, kind, compassionate, and suffered in silence. At times, Jesus was all of those things, but that's only part of the story. We often neglect to include how He got Himself in "trouble." Jesus was bold, outspoken, powerful, occasionally disruptive and confrontational, and He was always angered at sin. He took action. He got in the face of authority, and He even got physical from time to time (remember the money changers in the temple? Matt 21:12). Jesus did not fear even those who could make Him suffer. His motivation was always true and holy. Jesus is the Son of God, the Savior of the world; He is also a leader that inspires. Jesus was focused on what is good, which at times made Him do some things that many would say were "not nice."

There's nothing wrong with being a "nice guy," but it shouldn't be at the expense of being a "good guy." A good guy will stand up for what is right, call a spade a spade, and will not tolerate those that take advantage of others. A good guy must sometimes be powerful and show strength. He must be the leader his family, community, and work needs.

Don't be confused: nice is nice and good is good, but they are not always the same thing.

Is there a time to be a nice guy? Is there a time to be a good guy?

What Women Find Attractive In Men

Women are sometimes hard to figure out. Remember the Mel Gibson movie, What Women Want? You know, I can't read my wife's mind, nor do I care to. I know it's better that way.

So what do women want? I suggest that we'll never know for sure, especially when you're trying to figure out an individual woman. I think we're on our own on this one. (At least, we're all in the same boat, and there's safety in numbers.) Seriously, though, a little research can give us some pretty good insight on women from a broader perspective.

A search of the Internet shows some of the biggies women look for in guys are men who are self-confident, intelligent, possess a good sense of humor, respect women, display integrity, and make good eye contact.

Surprised?

If not, there was one attribute that women mentioned that might come as a surprise: a godly man. Yes, a godly man-one who lives his faith in word and deed.

Something to think about, isn't it?

What do you think?

Man Stuff

Welcome to "Man Stuff"-a discussion forum of the Men's NetWork from Lutheran Hour Ministries.

Every week or so, we will throw out a topic where regular guys can dispense opinions, kick around ideas, or just read the commentary for the heck of it.
Agreement is fine, but a "spirited conversation" is a whole lot more fun. Join the dialogue; speak your mind; stir it up. "Man Stuff" will give you an idea how other guys view their world and their role as leaders at work, in the community, at church, and at home.

What will we talk about? There will be all kinds of stuff-serious, not so serious, sports, politics, current events, religion, leadership-just about anything is fair game. What's on your mind? If you're thinking about it, chances are you're not alone. Shoot us a topic idea, and we will send it up the proverbial flagpole.

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