Do Guys Need Encouragement?

The ending of every "Lone Ranger" TV episode was identical -- someone asking, "Who was that masked man? I wanted to thank him." The Lone Ranger rode out of town knowing he saved the day, but he needed no thanks.

Bruce Wayne as Batman runs away at the end of the movie "The Dark Knight" knowing he will never receive recognition or thanks for the good he did for Gotham City.

James Ryan in "Saving Private Ryan" stands at the French graveside of his fallen compatriots and ponders if he truly earned the sacrifice it took to save him.

Ever since the formation of America, the American male has been portrayed as the strong, silent man of action. He will start nothing but finish everything. He will protect and uphold the weak. He has contempt for the self-righteous and cannot abide in wrongdoing. A whole cadre of male movie actors reinforce this stereotype - Audie Murphy, James Arness, Gene Autry, William Boyd, Gary Cooper, Robert Duvall, Clint Eastwood, Mel Gibson, Harrison Ford, Sean Connery, Bruce Willis, Vin Diesel, and John Wayne.

A boy growing up in America is surrounded by the historical and contemporary concept that he needs to be manly, to be strong, to take action, and to act without expectation of reward, recognition, or respect. To "do the right thing" is reward itself. But do we men need reward, recognition, and respect? Is it enough to know we are doing the right thing? Do we need encouragement? Do we need the "atta boy"? Are we weak when we crave a "thank you" for a job well done? Are we unmanly to expect a monetary reward for going above and beyond the expectations of our job, our position, or our assignment?

I'm just asking. What do you think?

What Would You Die For?

Our military are trained for one thing and one thing only -- protect our nation from all dangers. Often that means mortal combat and soldiers will lose their lives. Our fallen combatants understood they might have to offer their lives, and still they went into battle.

The first responders of this nation are often called upon to put themselves in harms way -- knowing they may have to pay the ultimate price for their service. Still, they enter burning buildings, speed down highways enroute to disasters, and brave hazardous conditions to rescue strangers.

Our police officers carry firearms as a standard part of their uniform. They know that at any moment, with any traffic stop, with any domestic disturbance call, they may be called on to use deadly force to serve and protect. Officers willing to use deadly force understand they, too, are in danger and may be called upon to offer their lives.

First-century Christians worshipped Christ -- often at the risk of their own lives. They devised an elaborate system to stay under the radar of the Roman government. They knew Rome wanted to exterminate the Christian faith, and the only way to accomplish this was the annihilation of its believers. The choice was to deny Christ or face death. They followed Christ.

Our military, the first responders, our police officers, and first-century Christians all belong to a community that understands men who are called upon to offer their lives need to be surrounded by men who encourage, support, and are willing to make ultimate sacrifices themselves. A band of brothers -- united together and all called upon equally to offer the same sacrifices -- help each other face the future with bravery.

Many of us in North America do not know what it means to face the threat of death in our job or our faith life. Most of our occupations do not place us in mortal danger, nor do we face death to worship, pray, and witness openly to Christ.

Do we take advantage of this freedom? Do we share Christ? Do our lives witness to our words? We may not be called upon to die for our faith, but are we willing to suffer some embarrassment or ridicule to share our faith? Are we willing to risk being made fun of as we pray in restaurants, thanking God for His blessings, or share words of witness with another? Are we willing to stand apart from the world around us and speak against injustice, immorality, and sin? I confess I miss opportunities.

I need encouragement from my brothers in the faith who will strengthen me with their resolve, support me in my trials, and willingly stand with me in a common fight. How about you?

Guest Rant

I may not go to church on Father's Day. I've been a father for 31 years and, frankly, I haven't been at very many Father's Day worship services that I much appreciated. That will probably raise the hackles on the necks of some of the pastors and others out there. But it's the truth. I don't like going to church on Father's Day. And I just might not go this year.

And this will probably further aggravate you-the primary reason I may not go to church is the sermon. I'm pretty sure what it will be. It will be about how fathers shirk their duties and really need to step up to the plate and be the fathers God calls them to be. I know that, because that's what it is always about. You see, in my experience, Father's Day in church is the exact opposite of Mother's Day in church-and it's not just because the sexes are different. On Mother's Day we get a sermon about how valuable mothers are in the lives of their children. We may hear about Timothy's mother and how she provided spiritual nourishment for him. We might hear about Mary under the cross, her heart breaking over her Son's death. But, you can rest assured that we'll hear about the value of mothers and how wonderful they are. And I don't disagree with that at all.

But, in my 31 years as a father, I can't remember a single Father's Day sermon that treated dads the way we treat moms on Mother's Day. I have left church every single time feeling beaten up and condemned because I couldn't live up to the standards given in those Father's Day messages.

I'll go to church 51 Sundays a year, sing the songs with gusto, revel in the forgiveness secured for me by my Savior, commune with His joy and peace in my heart, and leave uplifted, restored, and encouraged. But on this one Sunday, I really don't want to be there-don't want to get spiritually flogged one more time. Yes, curiosity and commitment will probably get the best of me and on June 21 I'll probably be in church-though I won't want to be there. I guess I'm daring my pastor to surprise me. Let me know my service as a father has been a valuable service. Remind me my own heavenly Father forgives, encourages, and empowers. Help me feel good about this important role God has me play in the lives of others. For those of us who have taken up the mantle of fatherhood and done the best we can, tell us about it. Go ahead! I dare you!

Lessons Learned Fishing With My Dad

All the talk about a fishing tournament got me to thinking about my dad. My dad is in heaven now, but he's still nearby in my thoughts. He would have been one of the first to register for the fishing tournament because he loved to fish. He would go alone, with his friends, with his sister-in-law, with his dad, with his children, just about anybody except mom. Mom would eat the fish, but never catch them.

I still can hear the birds singing as dad and I sat on the banks of the channel waiting for the bobber to go under. I can smell the water and feel the sun on the back of my neck, as dad sat next to me and taught me fishing lessons:

1. Be patient - not every cast will catch a fish.
2. Be kind to the environment - pack out your trash.
3. Storms are okay - fish will bite in the rain.
4. Use the right bait - if fish are biting worms, don't give them minnows.
5. Plain poles can catch just as many fish as fancy ones.
6. If the fish don't bite - don't blame the fish.
7. Speak softly - loud noises can scare fish away.
8. Casting across the channel doesn't always guarantee more fish - sometimes the best cast is the one that lands closest to you.
9. Don't rock the boat - you could fall in.
10. Sit down, be quiet, and pass the worms - you need bait to catch fish.
11. Not every fish caught is a "keeper" - sometimes you have to throw them back to let them grow.
12. If you cut yourself, pour some beer on it - the alcohol will sting, but it will be better for you in the long run.

The older I got, the more dad shared different things. He offered advice about dating, job interviews, how to double clutch a manual transmission, what to look for in a used car, how to apply for a loan, and why church is important. Today I may not fish with my dad, but his lessons have worked well for me. In fact, I find it interesting that most of his lessons applied to so much more than fishing. I think he had a plan.

Why I Don't Have A Fish On My Truck

In ancient Rome, it was against the law to openly declare oneself a Christian. So the practice developed of scratching a fish symbol in the dirt to indicate one followed Christ. Even today the fish symbol is displayed to indicate that one is a Christian.

When I purchased my pick-up truck, I thought for a while about putting a fish symbol on the back to tell the world I am a Christian. I soon abandoned the idea.

I am the type of person who has no patience with rude drivers -- ones that tailgate, cut me off, or stay in the far left lane when they should be merging. I have been known to be "hot on my brakes" when a driver is too close. As you might imagine, I love the smell of burning tires. I have been known to salute the driver who cuts me off. I have also been known to practice the "box-out" theory to prevent a rude driver from getting ahead of me after I have waited in line.

As you can tell, I really don't have much patience with rude drivers -- the ones who think their time is more valuable, the ones who like to put others at risk in order to gain one car length, the ones that swerve from lane to lane in order to get to their destinations five minutes earlier. So, I opted not to put a fish symbol on my truck. I probably wouldn't make a real good witness for Christ.

But then it hit me the other day! Since when does being a Christian mean giving up all rights and power? Is Christianity all about being a doormat for others to just walk over and take advantage of? To my memory, I have always had justification to be upset at rude drivers, Why shouldn't I declare to the world Christians have power? They have rights, and they can show righteous anger!

What do you think? Should I put a fish symbol on my truck or just keep my American flag?

Fire!

Three shots. Three dead pirates. Freedom for the captain. For Captain Phillips, on that day, in those circumstances, those three shots were the best sounds he could hear! The bad guys lay dead; the good guy gets to go home to his family.

It was time to take decisive action. The pirates had threatened a life. Their actions could no longer be tolerated. The command was given, and the Navy SEALs performed flawlessly.

I know this could have happened on any day, but it happened on Easter. Perhaps I am reading more into the significance of the day than I should, but it certainly caught my attention.

What an example for us as Christian men! In today's world, our beliefs, values, and freedoms are being taken hostage by evil forces bent on silencing Christian voices everywhere. Yes, Satan is pulling out all of the stops. He's using every means possible to turn us from God, cause us ignore Him, and to follow the desires of our sinful heart. Satan holds our tongue hostage and declares, "Don't speak out for Christ or I will make sure you are ridiculed." He binds our hands and whispers, "If you show acts of Christian compassion, I will make sure you are taken advantage of." He holds our actions hostage and proclaims, "Go anywhere you want; do anything you want. No one can take that from you. Hey, if you want to golf instead of go to church, go for it!"

It's time for the shots to ring out. It's time for us to stand up and silence Satan. It's time to speak up for Christ. It's time to not only proclaim our faith, but to show our faith by deeds. It's to remind Satan -- the filthy liar -- that he's lost the battle on Easter morning and is going to lose the war.

We know how this story ends...

The Talk

Okay, it's time for the "talk" -- you know the one -- the one you've been dreading since your kid had his or her first crush on some kid in their first-grade class. Yep, the sex talk is enough to make your stomach turn. But don't worry....

The good news is your kids are getting plenty of education on the subject -- TV, movies, the Internet, music, and their friends provide a continual stream of education. Yep, no need to have the talk about sex. They got it covered. They are doing a great job, too. The kids are learning lifelong patterns of behavior.

Let's see -- sextexting, sending nude pictures of oneself is now getting to be a socially accepted form of dating etiquette. According to a study by Teenage Research Unlimited, 22 percent of teenage girls and 18 percent of boys have taken nude or semi-nude photos of themselves and sent them to someone or posted them online.

And what about abortions? In the United States there are about 3,700 abortions performed each day with 52 percent of the females obtaining these abortions younger than age 25. Women aged 20-24 obtain 32 percent of all abortions; teenagers obtain 20 percent and girls under age 15 account for 1.2 percent. That means that every day there are 44 girls under the age of 15 having an abortion.

Hmmm. And what about STDs? At least one-in-four teenage girls nationwide has a sexually transmitted disease, according to a new study from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. That's more than 3 million teens, aged 14 to 19, infected.

Okay, Dads. As Nike® says, "just do it." Take time to talk to your sons and daughters about sex. Yes, it will be weird. Yes, you'll probably hate it and, yes, you may even stumble for words, but your kids -- in the short and long run -- will be better off for it. And, who knows? They may even thank you for it someday.