Virtue

Honesty. Truthfulness. Purity. Kindness. Forgiveness. Courage. Humility. Peace. Obedience. Integrity. Faithfulness. Trustworthiness. Mercy. Compassion. Hope. Perseverance. Love. Forgiveness. Responsibility. Cheerfulness. Strength. Loyalty.

This is a partial list of what we refer to as virtues-that is, qualities that are good, desirable, and beautiful in people. Some of these virtues come from lists in the Bible. Others come from classical antiquity or from cultures around the world. It doesn't really matter-the human race seems to have general agreement on what it means to be truly good-to be the way God meant us to be.

These virtues are goals we aspire to-things we want to see in our own lives and in the lives of the people around us. And they shine all the more brightly in the world we live in now-a world where so many powerful leaders openly lie, cheat, steal, and grab for what they want, with no concern for the needs of those weaker than themselves. And they have many imitators-possibly including a boss, a neighbor, or even a family member you live with. In dark times, virtue shines brightly. They attract us to themselves.

The Bible understands this desire. The prophet Micah references the virtues when he says, "He has told you, O man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?" (Micah 6:8) If we could actually do this-twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week, without messing up-actually living as the whole, healthy people God means us to be-how awesome that would be? It would be wonderful.

But of course, we don't manage it-not all the time, and not whole-heartedly. Which is why Micah was talking about it in the first place-he was talking to people who lived in a society just as messed up as ours is. They abused the poor and grabbed for money; they lived lives of excess and conspicuous consumption. Amos described them as people who "sell the righteous for silver, and the needy for a pair of sandals-those who trample the head of the poor into the dust of the earth" (Amos 2:6b-7a). Jesus described them as people "who devour widows' houses and for a pretense make long prayers" (Luke 20:47a). The details may have changed a bit, but the basic behavior remains-and not only in our leaders, but even at times in ourselves. Which of us does the right thing consistently-or even tries?

We need help. The virtues exist; we see them shining, sometimes, in people we admire, even in people we love and live with. We want to see them in ourselves. And for that, the Bible tells us, we need God's help. Trying harder can only take you so far. To really reach the goal God created us for-to be the people He means us to be-it takes God living in us, the Holy Spirit. As the early Christian leader Paul says, "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control" (Galatians 5:22-23a). These are the good things that God grows in everyone who trusts in Jesus Christ. It may take a long time-years, even a lifetime-as you doubtless know from watching Christians fail! But the virtues come in the end, because God is recreating people through His power so that they have a family resemblance to Jesus Himself. God will do this for anybody-anybody who really wants it and asks for it.

Written as a collaboration by THRED's in-house writing team

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Call Me Old-Fashioned

Call me old-fashioned, but I think technology is a little overrated. Yes, we can have pretty much anything we want delivered to us without even putting our pants on. Yes, we don't have to go through the hassle of making real friends when we can easily connect with people online. Yes, we don't even need to know where we're going before we get in the car.

But just because we have unlimited power at our fingertips, doesn't mean that we need to use it.

I learned this the hard way while spending an incredible ten days driving around southern Ireland with my fiancée.

Thanks to my stubborn (i.e. cheap) stance on not buying an international data plan, we were forced to navigate without the help of the internet.

Instead, we decided to rough it and use real a map.

What's a "real" map, you ask? Think Google Maps but analogue.

I know what you're thinking: "If this map you speak of is paper, then how does it update to let you know where you are?"

That's the beauty of it—it doesn't. No turn-by-turn directions. No continuous ETA. Just you, the open road, and a whole lot of confusion.

Confusion isn't always a bad thing. For us, it led to many surprising places and the occasional random adventure.

In our case, J.R.R. Tolkien's famous quote, "Not all those who wander are lost" couldn't have been further from the truth. We were both wandering and lost ... and it felt great.

Once we reached each city, we made it a habit to park the car and simply roam around until we came across a cafe or pub that tickled our fancy. Thanks to this (flying-by-the-seat-of-our-pants) strategy, we found hidden gems, met plenty of locals, and shared serendipitous conversations.

I can't think of a better way to spend your time.

Thanks to the brutal efficiency of Google Maps and other helpful technologies, we miss these fleeting opportunities every single day.

We're too busy with our heads down in our phones to realize life is passing us by.

In much the same way, I can't help but shun the invention of the audiobook.

I am one of the few remaining humans left who hasn't listened to one, and that's because I prefer its physical counterpart.

Call me old-fashioned, but I love the smell of a brand new book freshly off the shelf. I yearn for the feeling of accomplishment that comes with turning each crisp page. Heck, I even enjoy transforming mundane items such as receipts and coupons into useful bookmarks.

I'm not completely blind to the utility of e-books. As someone who listens to podcasts at 2x speed, I understand the convenience of "reading" while in the car or at work. We're all obsessed with productivity hacks and using multitasking as a misplaced badge of honor.

The thing is, I retain what I read much better when I actually read it. I want to build the magical world of Harry Potter for myself instead of having someone else do it for me, even if it is the insanely-talented Jim Dale (look him up, seriously).

Judging by these words, you may think I'm an old curmudgeon who despises technology. Quite the opposite—I'm just like any other millennial who's addicted to Instagram and spends most of his day behind a laptop.

My only issue with technology is that many of us rely on it to get by.

We have become crippled thanks to our dependence on technology to perform basic human functions like talking to others and finding our way from point A to point B.

Instead, we should be using it to enhance our lives, not run them.

What does this look like?

Using technology to amplify our ideas instead of our gossip. Talking with others who may not share our perspectives rather than publicly crucifying them. Embracing technology in order to learn and create instead of mindlessly consuming.

When used correctly, technology is an amazing way to take giant leaps forward.

That doesn't mean we don't need it to get started.

But hey, what do I know? I'm old-fashioned.

Written by William Frazier

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Nice vs Kind

One of the many unintended side effects of becoming a parent is that you're forced to develop a new relationship with the English language. I don't mean that you'll instantly gain an understanding of homophones, homonyms, and homographs— no such luck. What I mean is that you'll learn that "sit on the couch" can mean a multitude of different things, ranging from the traditional butt-on-seat variation, to many other more creative arrangements that could end with a butt placed in a number of surprising locations.

For example, I remember a time when I told my son to go into his room to put on a pull-up before bed. Well, he did exactly that. It wasn't until the next morning that I learned that what I should've said was "Take off your underwear, and then put on a pull-up."

When I was preparing Noah for kindergarten, I spent a lot of time talking to him about the importance of being "kind" and, of course, that required an explanation of what I meant by that. My initial explanation was probably something along the lines of "You know, like, nice or whatever ..." but when you really think about it, being nice and being kind aren't really the same thing, are they?

According to my old friend Merriam-Webster, to be nice is to be pleasant or agreeable. To me, this describes a behavior or a particular style of social interaction. Nice is something that can be turned on when you clock in at work and turned off the moment your shift ends. Nice is great for job interviews and first dates. Nice is common, but not necessarily always genuine. Politicians are (almost) always nice because being nice gets you votes.

Don't get me wrong, I want my son to be nice, but not nearly as much as I want him to be kind.

Old lady Merriam's definitions of kind include words like "helpful," "gentle," and "loving"—all words that fall right in line with the lesson I wanted to teach my son. "Nice" is a way to behave, whereas "kind" refers to the kind of person you are. Kind people aren't kind because it could possibly yield rewards, or because it's part of a job description. Kindness is a result of a genuine desire to help other people and do good. When my grandmother forces "soda money" into my pocket before I leave her home, she's doing it out of kindness.

Nice and kind are two words that are similar in definition, but far from interchangeable. Nice people aren't hard to find: go to any Starbucks or Chick-fil-A and you'll find dozens of them ready to provide you with the best dining experience possible. Truly kind people, on the other hand, are a little harder to find. These are the people who go out of their way to help others and do good, no matter the reward.

I think the best thing for all of us is to try to be at least a little bit of both. What about you?

How do you teach a child what kindness is and how to be kind? Seems like there's a lot of example giving in that one. How do you try to teach others how to be kind? How much of being kind is internal, like a personality trait?

Written by Justin Fantroy

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